Excerpt from Being With Dying: Cultivating Compassion and Fearlessness in the Presence of Death
Read Being With Dying: Cultivating Compassion and Fearlessness in the Presence of Death by Roshi Joan Halifax, PhD. Shambhala Publications.
“All too often, our so-called strength comes from fear, not love. Instead of having a strong back, many of us have a defended front, shielding a weak spine. In other words, we walk around brittle and defensive, trying to conceal our lack of confidence. If we strengthen our backs, metaphorically speaking, and develop a spine that’s flexible but sturdy, then we can risk having a front that’s soft and open.
How can we give and accept care with strong back, soft front, compassion, moving past fear to a place of genuine tenderness? I believe it comes when we can be truly transparent, seeing the world clearly and letting the world see into us.”
And, a quote from a TED talk on the subject by Dr. Halifax:
“It takes tremendous strength of the back to uphold yourself in the midst of conditions. And that is the mental quality of equanimity. But it also takes a soft front—the capacity to really be open to the world as it is, to have an undefended heart.”
(Roshi Joan Halifx, PhD, is the founder, abbot, and head teacher of the Upaya Institute & Zen Center in Santa Fe, New Mexico, USA.)
Excerpts from At Home in the World
Read At Home in the World by Thich Nhat Hanh. Parallax Press.
“There are many young people who were born and raised in the US, but who do not feel they are accepted as Americans by other Americans…. But they don’t fit in with their country of origin either. Very few of us feel we are in our true home. Even if we are lucky enough to have a nationality, a citizenship, and a passport, many of us are still searching for where we belong….
“I feel very comfortable in my home, even though I have been exiled from Vietnam for almost 40 years. Despite my exile, I don’t suffer, because I have found my true home. My true home is not Plum Village in France…. My true home cannot be defined in terms of place or culture. It’s simplistic to say that in terms of culture or nationality I am Vietnamese. I don’t have a Vietnamese passport or identity card, so, legally speaking, I am not Vietnamese. Genetically there is no such race as the ‘Vietnamese’ race. Looking into me, you can see Melanesian, Indonesian, Mongolian, and African elements. In fact, the Vietnamese race is made entirely of non-Vietnamese elements. This is true for any nationality. Seeing that can set us free. The whole cosmos has to come together in order to help you manifest.
“Our true home is the present moment, whatever is happening right here and now. Our true home is a place without discrimination [or] hatred. Our true home is the place where we are no longer seeking [or] yearning for anything, no longer regretting anything…. [Our] true home is something [we] have to create for [ourselves]. When we know how to make peace with our body, to take care of [it] and release [its] tension, then our body becomes a comfortable, peaceful home to come back to in the present moment. When we know how to take care of our feelings—when we know how to generate joy and happiness, and how to handle a painful feeling—we can cultivate and restore a happy home in the present moment. And when we know how to generate the energies of understanding and compassion, our home will be a very cozy, pleasant place to come back to…. Home is not something to hope for, but to cultivate….
“Liberation lies in the present moment. We can be in touch with our spiritual and blood ancestors right in the present moment…. When we can feel these ancestors with us in the present moment, we no longer need to worry or suffer. When we stop trying to find our home outside ourselves—in space, time, culture, territory, nationality, or race—we can find true happiness. Our true home is not an abstract idea. It is a solid reality that we can touch with our feet, our hands, and our mind in every moment. If we know this, then nobody can take away our true home. Even if people occupy our country or put us in prison, we still have our true home, and no one can ever take it away….”